Chase in Shadow (Johnnies #1) by Amy Lane

Chase in Shadow by Amy Lane
My rating: ★ ★ ★ ★ ★

Chase Summers: Golden boy. Beautiful girlfriend, good friends, and a promising future. 

Nobody knows the real Chase.

Chase Summers has a razor blade to his wrist and the smell of his lover’s goodbye clinging to his skin. He has a door in his heart so frightening he’d rather die than open it, and the lies he’s used to block it shut are thinning with every forbidden touch. Chase has spent his entire life unraveling, and his decision to set his sexuality free in secret has only torn his mind apart faster. 

Chase has one chance for true love and salvation. He may have met Tommy Halloran in the world of gay-for-pay—where the number of lovers doesn’t matter as long as the come-shot’s good—but if he wants the healing that Tommy’s love has to offer, he’ll need the courage to leave the shadows for the sunlight. That may be too much to ask from a man who’s spent his entire life hiding his true self. Chase knows all too well that the only things thriving in a heart’s darkness are the bitter personal demons that love to watch us bleed.

“God. No wonder it was so easy. He’s been bleeding since he was a baby. He just never told anyone. How do you even know it hurts after all that time?” Because you loved me, and I knew what it meant to feel.”

~Review~

Wow, this book was amazing. Can i give it 6 stars? I have never felt so much pain when reading a book. I was totally invested in these characters lives. Tommy and Chase suffered in this book, and I suffered right along side them.
I started this book a while ago, but wasn't in the right frame of mind to get through it. I only managed a few pages. I picked it up again yesterday and thought 'I will finish it this time'. I had to put it down a few times during the last two days, because it just hurt to keep reading, I needed the break. My soul needed the break. But I loved it, so much. The breaks helped me saviour it too.


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